✌️The hills are alive with the sound of music, and those who were seen dancing were thought insane by those who could not hear the music... A filmmaker I admire was once quoted as stating that to achieve artistic success, we must leave small-town 'loserville' behind and stop competing with the 'losers' who dwell there. I disagree with him because, as creatives, it does not matter if we live somewhere affluent, gentrified, or trendy. If we choose to reside in a place that challenges our view of the world and our role within it, the success we aspire to as artists will be within our reach because our creativity will be informed by our community of choice. When I returned from university to live with my family nearly a decade ago, I received such a challenge because I didn't need to relocate to Los Angeles or Paris. For someone like me, to endure the character growth I am referring to, I need not look any further than the community from which I originate. To make a l...
✌️The hills are alive with the sound of music, and those who were seen dancing were thought insane by those who could not hear the music...
There will be no curiosity, no enjoyment of the process of life. All competing pleasures will be destroyed. But always— do not forget this, Winston— always there will be the intoxication of power, constantly increasing and constantly growing subtler. At every moment, there will always be the thrill of victory, the sensation of trampling on a helpless enemy.If you want a picture of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face— forever.
~George Orwell, 1984
I came of age in Canada during a time when I witnessed our nation, and society more broadly, gradually arrive at a sense of acceptance for members of the LGBTQ community. This period is best illustrated as occurring between 1996 and 2005, when queer people attained protected status in various federal and provincial human rights codes, and when gay marriage was ultimately legalized.
I grew up on what I refer to as a ramp. A ramp between when legislation was passed in parliament and when social changes ensued. Ramps are designed to ease transitions like these. We need these metaphorical ramps because we are human, and nobody likes being forced to change involuntarily. What happened when we were all on this ramp together, and how we treated each other, no longer matters because it is in the past. What matters most is that we have arrived at a place of acceptance and respect for one another.
Of course, I can only speak for myself, but I feel that my sexual orientation is finally a non-issue with people. We all need ramps sooner or later because we aren't perfect, so I am writing this. I make mistakes, too.
Realizing all of this helped me understand that my recovery isn't all about me, and this sparked a massive amount of personal growth because this ramp metaphor applies to mental illness and addiction, as well.
I was a punk to trample over people in an attempt to ascend my career ladder. I simply did not possess the social skills to recognize how disrespectful I was to employers, such as Bee-Clean and Compass Group, for instance.
I was wrong about other things as well.
Lieslotte & Diesel Von Germanstein* are perfectly flawed and lovable creatures worthy of my forgiveness, several times over. Three years ago, I threw these women under the bus. I hope I can one day receive their forgiveness. This one thing is for sure - my problems in life began well before I met these women, and clinically speaking, I have a lot more to write about how institutionalized homophobia affected my childhood.
Nobody's perfect.
I look forward to contributing to this community with more than pipe dreams. By narrating my experiences growing up with whom I affectionately refer to as 'The People of the Boot,' I believe the ramp we are all on together will lead us to a better place.
I'm not telling my story out of spite or to get even with anyone. Just as the historical setting of my existence has affected my development, so have its geographical and political settings. As the Canadian Armed Forces are set to receive increased government spending, I hope they also consider the unique needs of military family members.
Our world needs more servicemen like Daddy_Shark*, not fewer. His high cheekbones, broad nose, and chiselled jawline give him a shark-like face that is handsome and fearsome in equal measure. But I was wrong about him. Daddy_Shark is not a bully to those who know him. I am grateful he stood up to me when our paths crossed in 2016. I was wrong, and he was right.
Since that year, the city of Belleville has made a man out of me - or as close as I can get to one - because this community has helped me understand that behaviour is a choice and the person responsible for keeping me out of jail doesn't work at Belleville General Hospital, or for Belleville Police Service. The only person keeping Andrew Parrott out of jail is Andrew Parrott.
I consider it an honour and a privilege to lay my life bare in this collection of memoirs. By reading about my life experiences and equipping parents with the right words, it is my sincerest hope that other survivors will have their feelings validated, and that together we can all make our communities very uncomfortable environments for child abusers.
*Content on this blog is obfuscated to avoid litigation.
Comments
Post a Comment